Human law its quite clear on the topic of these creatures, it is absolutely prohibited  to keep  dragons as pets as they are clearly a potential fire risk. Fairy law however is less prescriptive; here a dragon up to the age of adolescence may be domesticated after which time ( under fairy law # 587/hazards ) the dragon must be returned to the wild.

A Story For Jax

 Twice upon a time ( yes it really was that long ago) at the edge of the Great Eastern Forest a boy called Jax worked in his garden. Earlier that day, at school, he had swapped a bubblegum card for some magic woofle dust. This same woofle dust was now trickling out of his pocket and into the trench into which Jax was carefully placing the seed potatoes. The very next day the potato plants were growing ( well they were labelled "earlies"). By Tuesday the plants were bigger than Jax's house and by Wednesday afternoon aeroplanes had to fly around  them. It was then the man from the council came and said,

" You need planning permission for a thing that size and you will have to pay tax on it too"

Poor Jax, what could he do? It was that very night that Jax had a dream in which an elf called  Button Nose ,who lived in the great beech tree on Shady Track Road, offered to buy Jax 's potatoes. The very next day Jax set off for Shady Track Road in search of this elf and at the very bottom of a fence, hidden from the grownups was a tiny door with a wheel barrow outside it. Standing outside the house there  was Button Nose his hands in his pockets and worrying on how he was going to feed 347 elves at Elf Fair on Saturday. It was Jax that suggested cream of potato soup with Mrs. Dobson's crusty bread rolls. And that is how Jax sold his magic potatoes and how the elves of the great Eastern Forest feasted well into the night at the Elf Fair. It is said it was there that this song was first sung.....

Fill your bellies, and fill your sacks

Fill  the barrows and fill your packs

Potatoes here for one and all

Buy them at the market stall

But some are free so help your self 

Good Elf , Good Elf ,

And thank you Jax.

Traditional Fairy Song

fairy door with wheelbarrow and elf
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fairy silhouette
dragon in hand

The moonlight fades from flower and rose
And the stars dim one by one;
The tale is told, the song is sung,
And the Fairy feast is done.

From  "Fairy Song"  by Louisa May Alcott

oriental fairy door

It is obvious that this  fairy door displays a somewhat oriental  look.

  The house originally belonged to Si Lang the famous Chinese conjurer (1857-1904). He is perhaps best  known for his famous underwater matchbox escape. Sadly Si Lang tragically died  shortly before his forty seventh birthday while attempting to catch a falling acorn in his teeth.

 The house is still owned by  the Langs although  no current family members are involved in the entertainment business.

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The Great Pine Cone Debate

This unassuming house has recently become the subject of heated debate regarding the awarding of the pine cone decoration status. It is undisputed that, in the past, famous people lived here however it is the nature of that fame that is causing the controversy.
In 1774 this was the house of the infamous Bindweed Brothers notorious outlaws and highwaymen. History records that they traded in illegal dew drops and other dubious transactions. Despite their notoriety their  good looks always guaranteed their popularity with the lady fairies and on numerous occasions helped them evade justice. Alas their luck was not to last for in 1779 they were betrayed by a jealous husband and had their wings clipped in public in Alnwick market place.
Should a pine cone decoration honour such outlaws? No doubt the debate will continue for many years to come and the current owners of the house have asked for their opinion on the matter to remain undisclosed so as not to influence the debate.


 

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Georgian styled book cover

Most adventures from the fairy realm have found their way into human culture under the general title of "Fairy Tales " however stories of a more risque nature tend to lose their "fairy" attributes within human society.
Here we see the human cover from the book "Bindweed Some Amorous Adventures."  In the illustration the  cast have lost their wings and are portrayed as humans yet the stories within are clearly those historical accounts of the fairy Bindweed brothers' romances. I am told that the fairy version of the book is much more explicit than its human counterpart.

risque fairy

The illustration on the left depicts part of the cover-art from the fairy version of the Bindweed book which has recently been both updated and reprinted.

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Bindweed Brothers Update

print of two amorus fairies

The illustration on the right shows an illustration from the 1905 fairy edition of the book .

Since my last posting regarding the Bindweed Brothers I have  had  numerous requests as to where to buy a copy of their book. The  human  version of the book is currently out of print but may be available at second hand book stores (try Barter Books Alnwick). It is  however  the new fairy edition of the book I have most enquiries about, I believe that this is sometimes available at the Fairy Amazon market but stocks quickly sell out. Please note you also have  to pay extra  to have it shipped in a plain wrapper (recommended).

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Advert for Victorian Magic Lantern Show

I am honoured to include this fairy door in this compilation as the house owner, Professor Dockweed, recently retired and the local fairy newspaper felt the occasion was  sufficiently important  as to warrant headline news.

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Sandwort Gazette Lantern Show Headlines
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There can few fairies in Warkworth who have not sat beneath the stars in the great mushroom circle during the autumnal equinox and gazed in wonder  at  the  visual delights of Professor Dockweed's magic lantern show. Now after 37 years in the business he has decided to retire and hand the running of the show over to his beautiful daughter Poppy who, for the last four years, has been his capable assistant.

  In his interview in the Sandwort Gazette Professor Dockweed was asked how his interest in magic lantern slides began, I thought his  answer was moving almost to the point of being poetic.

 " .......deep below the sycamore tree the attic of my parent's home had no windows and the space was lit by a single shadeless bulb suspended from the rafters. Like all attics it harboured the large, the seasonal and the obsolete and it was here that the pleasures of childhood could be found. There were infinite delights in almost everything but ear-marked for special consideration was a black tinplate  magic lantern and a large box of slides. Using  this device darkness could be controlled and pure cones of colour could be forced  into even the dustiest of corners. Within that lantern Gulliver discharged his pistol to startled Lilliputians and Ali Baber endlessly discovered the robber's cave.These were my true childhood companions, figures of light liberated from squares of glass.

  Later as an adult these characters were to live again in books but as a young fairy only I knew where Sinbad rested between voyages."

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Victorian Magic Lantern Slide of Little Red Riding Hood
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Spoof solicitor advert

Warkworth Highways Dept. Public Service Announcement 

Fairy Highways Department announce that the Alnwick to Warkworth rainbow that was scheduled for 3:47 p.m. on the 4th December has been cancelled for structural maintenance. Please check with the Sandwort Gazette for the rescheduling time of the  operation. A full list of rainbow times is listed in your local fairy almanac. 

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Fairy door,brass studs, Warkworth

 An  Illuminating Thought

Many years ago this building was the business premises of 

Milk-Thistle & Sons Ltd. 

a firm specialising in the reproduction of antique sunbeams.

 Since the influx of cheaper eastern replicas in the 1960's the firm was forced into liquidation. The premises were eventually sold off and have now become a large  private residence. The current owners inform me that, what used to be the old quality control bay is now the living room and  is still lit by some of the original stock.

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fairy advert
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spoof cinema ad

 Clairvoyant Convention Great Success

 This house has recently been the venue for a national convention of clairvoyants. A spokesman for the group  stated that the event had been a great success. When asked if they will be holding a similar event next year he said  " We don't know yet."

Ivy Clad

  She stood with her back to the door and regained her breath. Her strength throughout had remained much  the same  yet her confidence now  ebbed and flowed with tidal surges of self-doubt.

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